When the 4 year old is asking a million questions and the 2 year old is constantly getting into things hes not supposed to, and they are both yelling and screaming, and all i want them to do is pick up their toys, and im at the point where it will just be easier for me to give up and just pick the toys up myself…what will i be teaching them?
When the 16 year old is making some lifestyle changes that are not ok, and you’ve explained to him 100 times the potential consequences, and you’ ve argued with him, and you’re ready to settle because he seems happy and at least hes not as bad as some of those other kids…what will I be teaching him?
The Book ofProverbs has some very solid and practical teachings on parenting, and in this post we will look at the subject of discipline.
Proverbs 13:24. The one who will not use the rod hates his son, but the one who loves him disciplines him diligently.
Now…to clarify, you do not have to beat your child with a rod. This is a method of discipline used when the book was written. You can discipline your child any way you see fit. The point of this verse is that if you truly LOVE your child, you will do what it takes to steer them in the right direction. If you would rather take the easy road out, skip on the discipline and let your own child settle for second best, then perhaps it is time to take a gut check to see how much you really love your child.
Proverbs 23:13. Don’t withhold correction from a youth; if you beat him with a rod, he will not die.
Discipline will not kill your kid. Do you know of a kid who died from getting his video games taken away, got his car keys taken away, got put in time out, got spanked, had to miss a school dance or sporting event? In my experience, the discpline is actually harder on the parent than it is on the child. If i have to put my four year old in time out, i feel horrible, because i want her to enjoy all of the time she has with me. She gets up a few minutes later, lesson learned, and moves on. She didnt die. Me, on the other hand, could use a pick me up, even though i know i did the right thing.
Proverbs 29:15. The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a youth left to himself is a disgrace to his mother.
Kids learn how to follow rules, boundaries, and proper ways to treat other people when they are disciplined. They learn how to succeed in this life, how to have great relationships, and how they can raise their own kids someday. Undisciplined youth end up jobless, underemployed, on drugs, in prison, or maybe still in your basement at the age of 30. We, as parents, are responsible for teaching our kids, and for disciplining our kids. You cannot pawn off responsibility to the school, the church, the government, the babysitter, or anyone else. These other avenues are here to help you, not take away your God given responsibility as a parent.
Discipline is a necessity for your kids, because they are born sinners. Kids will naturally do things that are dumb and short sighted. Parents need to be there to steer them in the right direction. This can include gifts and rewards for good behaviors and time outs, groundings, or spanking for bad behaviors. If you are unwilling to
discipline your kids, you are failing them as a parent and setting up their future for failure as well. It’s not easy to discipline them at times…it’s usually easier not to. However, there is a reason that that parenting is the most difficult and the most rewarding job you will have in this life. God has given you all the tools you need to be a great parent, use everything that you have, an give it everything you have. God will take care of the rest.
Please let me know if you have questions or need help!